We are always at the party of Achashveirosh

Purim print from Jewish Heritage Online Magazine

Rabbi Gavriel Goldfeder of Kehilath Aish Kodesh writes:

The battle between Haman and Mordecai over the fate of the Jews was not a momentary battle – it is an eternal battle. We are always choosing one or the other – Haman or Mordecai. The Gemarra Megillah 12a says on the verse ‘[they gave wine] according to every person’s will [literally ‘by the will of every man and man].’ Rava explains that it was according to the will of Haman dn Mordecai – they were the ones serving the wine at Achashveirosh’s party. MaHaRSha writes on this that everyone was caught in the balance between the wills of these two giants – Mordecai wanted the Jews not to drink, and Haman wanted everyone to drink.

But we are always at the party of Achashveirosh, and we are always choosing between these two wills that are pulling us in either direction. Rebbe Nachman in Torah 70 writes about these two opposing forces, always pulling us in two opposite directions. But we have to realize the urgency and the danger of every moment. We have to realize that, though Purim is celebrated only once a year, it is really the story of the everyday, of what is happening all the time. It is not a story of miracles and once-in-millennia events like the parting of the sea. It is the story of G-d in our lives all the time, the hidden miracles, the story behind the story. It is just that we only have the courage, and the ability, to look at that reality once a year. ‘And Aharon shall not come at all times into the Holy of Holies…’ It is too much, too overwhelming, to realize that we are also just puppets, that we are also masks for G-d, that our decisions ultimately amount to nothing.

So once a year we dress like puppets and lose our minds in order to orient ourselves to the true reality. But if we spent all of our time there, nothing would get done. And it is Hashem’s will that we do what we can, and not come at all times into that Holy space.

But we have to realize the impact of this moment. The Megillah proves to us that there are no small moments or large moments. ‘Run toward even a ‘small’ Mitzvah, and run away from transgression. For a Mitzvah leads to [lit. has in tow] another Mitzvah, and a transgression leads to another transgression.’

This moment seems insignificant in and of itself, but the battle between Mordecai and Haman is happening at this very moment as much as at any moment. The battle didn’t end with Haman’s hanging. That was just the end of act I.

R’ Eliezer Berland said, ‘For Haman is only an image, a scarecrow. There is no Haman; it’s just the side of unholiness that sometimes clothes itself as Haman sometimes in someone else. So they hanged the scarecrow, but the spirit remained. It returns again in every generation, it can descend again at any moment.’ The most dangerous thought is to think that we have killed him – he is gone.

He is not gone. He waits for you to think he is gone, so in the next moment, he can damage us.

Comments

[gavriel goldfeder]

what a genius! sincerely, Rabbi gavriel Goldfeder